girl scouts told me to shoot for the stars

I was told recently by someone I care very much about that I set my expectations too high so then I am always just let down. I guess it's only a little ironic that if that were the case, this person must also believe himself to be a let down, which is most certainly not the case.One of my favorite things to tell people used to be that I set my goals a little higher than what I thought I could actually attain, so that I did my very best regardless and even got lucky and caught a break every now and then, which is what I would consider the person who brought about this blog.

But it infuriated me. I realized that when you put it that way, I just sounded high maintenance. If it's not the ideal restaurant, or street for the restaurant to be on with the ideal ambience, across from a cupcake stand, or a big tree with lights in it, then I would not eat, just sit on the curb sulk and find a way to nurse my weak little margarita and be unsatisfied. But even on the occasions I do that, it only lasts about 10 minutes then I'm on to the next little cafe in the sky I think would make a good alternative. And I can deal with the disappointment if that next place has fluorescent lights, gag me, because the anticipation of what I think could be exactly what I've pictured in my mind is a fun chase. And I'm always chasing.

i know i don't look 22.

i get bored easily. my mother says this is a fault on my part, a weakness of the mind showing a lack of creativity or the ability to entertain oneself without any external stimuli or source of interest. someone i know based what he expected from me in regards to my decisions, expectations and preferences on my decisions, expectations and preferences the day before. perhaps this makes sense, but yesterday bores me and making decisions today requires quite a bit on my part, which takes time, and this bores me. i usually don't know what i want until i have it, which is a little better than not knowing what you want until you can't have it but then again even though i know what i want doesn't mean i can have it, and disappointment bores me almost as much as yesterday does.

i am indecisive, but not miserable.